2014 Fall TV Preview: the Returning Shows on ABC

Only 3 new shows from last year return this season: S.H.I.E.L.D., Resurrection, and The Goldbergs. The rest of ABC's lineup is the same, which led to a fourth place finish last year, one better than The CW. Finishing below The CW is like the Texas Rangers finishing below Houston this season. Paul Lee feels proud of ABC's diversity heading into the 2014-2015 season. The lack of intense questions about ABC's repeated poor finish year after year surprised me. TV critics treat an underwhelming finish with the same intensity as FOX news treats Obama vacationing during a most volatile time in the United States of America. Lee acknowledged the disappointing stretches during last season, but noted the network rebounded in early 2014. Of course he'll find the positive. NBC beat ABC again, Paul Lee. I don't even care about where a network finishes. I briefly considered opening this post with a Chekhov short story.

MARVEL’S AGENTS OF S.H.I.E.LD. returns Tuesday, September 23 at 9PM

Agents of S.H.I.E..L.D. became a better series after the release of Captain America 2: Winter Solider because Marvel allowed the creative team to introduce the Big Bad of the season: Hydra. There were ways to make a good series before Captain America 2. The writers, including my beloved Joss Whedon, may’ve had a villain unrelated to the series. I think the Hydra call came from the well-paid men running Marvel. Parallel storylines between television and movies forms a cohesive whole. Whedon shows take off in season 2. Buffy season 2 rocks. Angel season 2 is legendary. Dollhouse season 2 is great. Last season ended with Coulson becoming the director of S.H.I.E.L.D. The group is more scattered because S.H.I.E.L.D. is scattered. The effects of Coulson’s resurrection seem likely to become clearer. Chloe’s the key, the River Tam, the only vampire with a soul, in this series. So more about her would be lovely. I want S.H.I.E.L.D. to amaze every episode.

THE MIDDLE returns Wednesday, September 24 at 8PM

The little I find about The Middle every year when writing about The Middle regards its monetary worth and value. There’s nothing about the story, the characters, or why it’s an underrated series. The Middle helps launch shows behind it. Ugh. Sue’s a wonderful character. The family went to Disney World in last year’s finale. It’s nice ABC still sends shows to Disney. Next season should conclude with a family trip to Ohio’s National Park.

THE GOLDBERGS return Wednesday, September 24 at 8:30PM

Creator Adam F. Goldberg told Vulture that he’ll continue telling innocent stories about the family going forward because his characters remain young. Good enough.

MODERN FAMILY returns Wednesday, September 24 at 9PM

Cameron and Mitchell open the season happily married. Hayley will enjoy a relationship with Joe’s caretaker, if I read that correctly. The rest of the family will experience hijinks and silliness. Modern Family continues to be ABC’s most successful comedy. Other writing staffs envy Modern Family’s room wrapping up at 5PM every day. I remember actively avoiding Modern Famiyl because Megan Ganz, once hired, used it to take a dig at Dan Harmon. Maybe Dan Harmon deserved it for keeping his writers in the room past 1AM. A buddy of mine showed my friends and I some episodes during a Christmas jawn. It is very enjoyable.

NASHVILLE returns Wednesday, September 24 at 10PM

TVLine speculated about season 3 after seeing a poster. I don’t think there’s much out about season 3 unless one pillages a spoiler page.

GREY’S ANATOMY returns Thursday, September 25 at 8PM

Grey’s Anatomy begins season 11. Goodness gracious, friends and well-wishers. Shonda Rimes told The Hollywood Reporter she sees no end date ahead. Goodness gracious, friends and well-wishers. Meredith Grey may be the focal point of the season. I see that a character named McCreary exists, but a female character. I remember the days of McSteamy and McDreamy. All of the interest in new Grey’s Anatomy seasons centers around romantic couplings. Who will love each other? Who will break-up? Relationships and love affairs are the least interesting parts of story. Grey’s Anatomy fans, I’m sure you’re not reading my blog, because no one reads my blog, but love will bloom this season.

SCANDAL returns Thursday, September 25 at 9PM

Portia de Rossi and Sonya Walger joined the cast for the fourth season of Scandal. Shonda Rhimes posted a picture of the season 4 premiere script. I read the title. Tom Verica will direct, which should excite fans. He’s a wild dude. He’ll act on another Shonda show and direct during his free time. Geez louise. That helps to emphasize my lack of accomplishments.

ONCE UPON A TIME returns Sunday, September 28 at 8PM

I watched the Comic-Con video of the writers. I’d watch weekly webisodes starring Eddie and Adam, along with the other writers, instead of the series, which I abandoned over a year ago. I watched one act of one episode last season to see what I missed. Would the one act draw me back? Would the execution of character, tone, plot, et al, convince me to give it a second chance? No. Emma suffered from amnesia. Season 4 will have a prolonged Frozen storyline. Oh, what a hacky, hacky show.

RESURRECTION returns Sunday, September 28 at 9PM

Resurrection premiered during the deep days of my Nabokov plunge. I vaguely remember comparisons to The Leftovers. I watched the final scene of season one. Bellamy’s caught in a rough spot trying to protect the 8 year old returned from the dead. Will the two enjoy mint chocolate chip milkshakes in season 2? God I hope so.

REVENGE returns Sunday, September 28 at 10PM

David Clarke never died, huh? I knew I made the right decision to stop watching and reviewing Revenge last year. Ah. The warm feeling of certainty confirmed.

CASTLE returns Monday, September 29 at 10PM

Castle disappeared in the season finale. ABC will promote the “Vanished!” hook to anyone interested in watching a series without seeing the first six seasons (or those who fell away from the series). It seems Castle finally becomes a character in a book he didn’t write, which seems kind of post-modern in Borges way. I’m sure I’ll regret comparing Castle to Borges when I’m alone in a wood at some future date.

LAST MAN STANDING returns Friday, October 3 at 8PM