A Classic Episode of Television: Dawson's Creek's "Appetite For Destruction"

I use the word classic with liberty. Truthfully, I won't write about LOST's "Walkabout" today, or Buffy's "The Body," or ANGEL's "Are You Now or Have You Ever Been," or Firefly's "Our Mrs. Reynolds." For the second time in this calendar year, the Classic Episode of Television gimmick will celebrate yet another season five episode of Dawson's Creek. I haven't written about Dawson's Creek in many fortnights, not since the goody summer re-watch of 2011. Originally, I planned on writing about the "Sex She Wrote" episode from Season 2, but the DVD turned heel on me.  The season five disc briefly skipped, which led me to think that the fates didn't want me to write about Dawson's Creek at all. After a DVD player switch, I watched "Appetite For Destruction" without any interruption.

"Appetite For Destruction" is the tenth episode of season five; a bottle episode that tries to be Woody Allen's September but fails miserably in the attempt. Some backstory for the uninformed: Dawson's father died in a car accident in #503, which sent Dawson into a tailspin in which he blamed Joey for his father's death. The titular character was lost, unable to return to his former egocentric life, instead forging a new egocentric life in which he killed his old egocentric self. At the center of his transformation is Joey Potter. In the days after his father's death, he shunned his soulmate from his life. Dawson needed space. Various trips to Boston only made things worse between the tortured teens. A weekend getaway to New Hampshire suddenly presented itself to Dawson in the form of a film festival. Dawson's multi-episode arc in season four, in which he filmed a documentary about a great local filmmaker, was entered into the festival by his mother, and the festival wanted to honor Dawson for the terrific work he did. Dawson invited Jen to accompany him to New Hampshire. The two mingled, bonded, and connected in a way they hadn't since the first season. Dawson re-discovered his life's purpose, and then Jen took his virginity.

"Appetite For Destruction" features one of the worst dinners in television history. Pacey served the salad as a third course. Undercooked (actually raw) lemon chicken was served as the second course. The fourth course was a single slice of chocolate cake for each guest, served with a creamy coffee. The assembled guests constantly insulted Pacey's ability to cook, despite the fact that he works in a five-star restaurant in downtown Boston (which is absurd in and of itself). For whatever reason, Jack and Joey WANTED undercooked lemon chicken. Given the series' history for premeditated murder in issues of romance (i.e. Dawson trying to kill Pacey with a boat in season three), I wouldn't have been surprised if Joey revealed that she wanted to kill Jen with raw chicken or, at least, make her quite sick for a day or two. Whenever the six friends are seated around the dinner table, sipping their water from expensive china, they comment directly on the poor quality of the food. Of course, each character's looking for a distraction because the revelation of sexual relations between Jen and Dawson sits well with no one. No one's seated for long. A character invariably will leave the table with another to talk about the Big Issue in private whilst two more characters find another place of the house to privately talk. The actions become repetitive and tedious.

Dawson and Joey successfully constructed their own myth in the previous four years, which is why everyone acts as strangely as they do. Even though the soul mates were apart longer than they were together, any other person who becomes romantically involved with either soul mates has to deal with the nonsense melodrama. The reason why Jen and Dawson's coupling burns Joey this time is because season four ended on a kiss between her and Dawson. The first two episodes of season five were about the possibility of another relationship between the soul mates. However, the death of Dawson's father changed everything, as I already explained. Suddenly, Joey wasn't the one who could take care of her best friend because he didn't want her to take care of him. Joey feels burned because Dawson rejected everything about her.

I compared the episode to Woody Allen's September earlier. September's more like a stage-play filmed than an actual film. The action takes place in one house. The tension's thick throughout because characters don't say what they wish to say. There are secrets. There are quiet and honest conversations between characters about the people in the house. There are fractured relationships. Indeed, there are fractured relationships in "Appetite For Destruction." Several episodes ago, Jen dismissed Jack as a 'two-dimensional beer guzzler." Jen promised Joey that she'd take care of Dawson, and now feels like she betrayed Joey's trust by sleeping with her soul mate. Dawson will tell Joey, in the third act that it hurts to be around her because her presence conjures up memories of a life he can't return to. Scenes between the DC characters involve two at a time, and that hurts the episode. The writing isn't strong enough to make those scenes interesting.

There are plenty of screenwriting rules. Professional screenwriters don't follow the rules. Some question them even. Still, there are basic screenwriting rules to follow. For instance, a scene's more interesting whenever three or more characters are involved. Scenes between two people, unless incredibly well-written, can drag or meander. Every damn two person scene in "Appetite For Destruction" drags. The only scene in which significant progress is made is Jen and Jack's, when they agree to be best friends again. The others are full of words, placeholders, disguised as character studies. Joey talks about her feelings to Audrey, Pacey and Dawson despite insisting that she DOESN'T want to talk about her feelings. None of her feelings are the least bit interesting.

The main problem is, by season five, no one cared about Dawson and Joey except for the writers. The Pacey-Joey romance killed any fan desire for a reunion between the forehead and the future Mrs. Tom Cruise. Joey's confessions of love, concern and affection make sense as a friend but not as a lover. I don't know why any of the writers simply decided, "You know what? Holmes and Beek suck together, their characters suck together, let's just stop." This entire episode's built on the idea that Jen and Dawson need to do damage control because their relationship has changed EVERYTHING. Unfortunately, no one cared, and that makes "Appetite For Destruction" a disaster.

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